Thought. Major League Baseball has long suffered the stigma of being an old person's sport, seemingly without the action or intrigue to attract "the millennials". In an effort to combat this, there is potential to strike up a deal with Dana White and the UFC, and hold an off-season 10 match "super card" that pits the stars of MLB against one another in MMA-style battles. The event could take place outside in one of MLB's more climate appropriate stadiums (I'm thinking The Ballpark at Arlington or Chase Field and help bridge the gap of the long offseason.
I'm sure Michael Weiner and the Major League Baseball Players Association would TOTALLY sign off on this. I mean, it's not like there'd be any liability issues or anything?!?
Sure. Yes. Neat.
Here is a prospective first year card...
CC Sabathia (Age: 31, Height: 6'7", Weight: 290 lb) vs Prince Fielder (Age: 27, Height: 5'11", Weight: 275 lb)
Analysis: The ultimate super heavyweight tilt that you could hope for in MLB. Huge contracts! Superstar profiles! Midriff bulge! Yes, it would mean we'd have to see the lumpy Prince in board shorts (barf!) but this could be the Andre the Giant vs Big John Studd for a new generation if marketed correctly. Epic in size, scale and appetite.
Verdict: CC
Tim Lincecum (Age: 27, Height: 5'11", Weight: 165 lb) vs Dustin Pedroia (Age: 28, Height: 5'9", Weight: 180 lb)
Analysis: On the other end of the spectrum, these two pint-sized superstars would very much like to put up their dukes, defending the honour of San Francisco and Boston respective. Honestly, I'm not sure how The Freak would do in the octagon, since he's just a "widdle guy" plus he's confessed a healthy appetite for the weed, which'd impact reaction times, etc. Pedroia is damn aggressive too. This one is easy to call.
Verdict: Dustin, quickly
Chris Carpenter (Age: 36, Height: 6' 6", Weight: 230 lb) vs Zack Greinke (Age: 28, Height: 6' 2", Weight: 190 lb)
Analysis: Milwaukee-St Louis is probably the best rivalry in MLB at the moment and I loved when these two had a war of words in the press during the post-season. In one corner, you have a lanky dude from New England with a cranky personality. In the other, you have the athletically gifted but mentally unsound enigma. Fascinating on a number of levels, especially when you consider that Carpenter's height advantage might be negated by Greinke's age and the fact he is a bit bipolar. Honestly, I would love to see these two beat on each other.
Verdict: Greinke but only by a slim margin
Brian Wilson (Age: 29, Height: 6'2", Weight: 205 lb) vs Jonathan Papelbon (Age: 30, Height: 6'4", Weight: 225 lb)
Analysis: Probably the two most annoying closers in MLB and now that JP has joined the Phillies, perhaps they'll get more opportunities to cross paths both on the diamond and off. Wilson tries way too hard to be a flake while Papelbon tries way too hard to be menacing... and has bad hair.
Verdict: Papelbon
Milton Bradley (Age: 33, Height: 6'0", Weight: 215 lb) vs Nyjer Morgan (Age: 31, Height: 6'0", Weight: 175 lb)
Analysis: Oh yes! These guys are both insane and would completely kick the (crap) out of one another. Bradley has a considerable weight advantage but is also very injury prone--his torn ACL was easily one of the most ridiculous sports injuries of the past 10 years. Morgan is probably angrier at this point in time, too. Another factor.
Verdict: Morgan in a surprisingly one-sided bust-up
Desmond Jennings (Age: 25, Height: 6'2", Weight: 200 lb) vs Brett Lawrie (Age: 21, Height: 6'0", Weight: 215 lb)
Analysis: In this service time spectacular, these two mid year 2011 rookies do battle in a match just oozing with swag. Honestly, this fight would be tremendous and would likely involve name callin' and showboatin'.
Verdict: Lawrie... or Jennings... I'm stumped
Rich Harden (Age: 29, Height: 6' 1", Weight: 195 lb) vs Erik Bedard (Age: 32, Height: 6' 1", Weight: 200 lb)
Analysis: Two ambulances would be waiting out back, as both these injury prone Canadians would no doubt be leaving the stadium in body bags. I mean, seriously, neither hurler can stay healthy enough to make it through a full MLB season so how are their weary bones and ligaments gonna react to the grind of an MMA bout? Badly. That's how.
Verdict: Harden by default, when Bedard trips in the ring steps and tears his left shoulder up again
Alex Rodriguez (Age: 36, Height: 6' 3", Weight: 230 lb) vs R.A. Dickey (Age: 37, Height: 6' 2", Weight: 220 lb)
Analysis: The Yankees-Mets rivalry has gone cold in recent years and this fight would really represent where both franchises are at circa right now. The Yanks would send arguably the greatest player of all-time and one of MLB's most familiar faces. The Mets would send a 30-something knuckleballer picked off the scrap heap. That being said, this could be a good underdog story and you shouldn't ever sell somebody with the last name Dickey short--he's probably been fighting to defend the honour of his last name his entire life.
Verdict: A-Rod although it'd be surprisingly close
Tim Wakefield (Age: 45, Height: 6'2", Weight: 210 lb) vs Omar Vizquel (Age: 44, Height: 5'9", Weight: 180 lb)
Analysis: The two oldest players in MLB, one of whom (Wakefield) didn't really seem like an athlete to begin with. It'd be fun if this was a chessboxing-esque hybrid where the twosomes started things out by debating health care reform (Nancy Pelosi could moderate) and then had a rousing fist fight, showing that the mid 40s really is the new early 40s.
Verdict: "Omar comin'!!!"
Nolan Ryan (Age: 64, Height: 6'2", Weight: 170 lb) vs Robin Ventura (Age: 44, Height: 6'1", Weight: 185 lb)
Analysis: Celebrating the 20 year anniversary of one of MLB's most famous fights, Nolan Ryan and Robin Ventura would have at it, as the assembled crowd chants, "One more time! One more time!" To up the ante and put something of a WWE spin on things, maybe Nolan would loose control of the Texas Rangers is he is defeated while Robin would immediately be fired from his freshly minted role as manager of the Chicago White Sox. Stakes is high, sons!
Verdict: Robin Ventura, in the ultimate act of comeuppance (via punching)
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